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The
Freud Test(according
to eMode)
 What
Would Freud Say About You?
Rosie, welcome to Part 4 of The Freud Test.
This week we'll focus on why you sometimes end up in patterns that
repeat themselves over and over, even though they are destructive to
you. |
 Freud
noticed that some people repeat the same behaviors over and over again,
seemingly drawing the experiences to them. What perplexed Freud about
this pattern was that often these experiences were negative. So why
is it that a person would feel compelled to repeat negative things?
 The
answer, as Freud saw it, was that people have a life instinct and a
death instinct. He used this idea to explain why people are destructive
at the same time they are constructive in their desires. However, even
Freud didn't feel totally comfortable with this explanation. More important
was simply identifying the pattern: A person repeats something they've
already experienced in life and when they have the opportunity to change
how it ends by behaving differently, they act the same. This assures
that the pattern repeats. When it comes to relationships, Freud believed
that repetition compulsion was tied to unresolved conflicts from the
Phallic Period and Oedipus Period.
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Take
Action
Look for this repetition pattern
in your own life. Are there things that you do time and again that
always end up being frustrating and unsatisfying, when in the beginning
you had very good intentions and fully expected things to be different
this time? Also, are there areas in life where you find yourself
reacting almost automatically to situations, as though there's no
other way to act, and therefore, no other way for the story to end?
If there are, you might actually be acting out a role you learned
in childhood. At times when you feel yourself falling into the same
trap over again, try to rethink your responses and consider what
it is that you might be repeating. Realize you have the power to
change. |
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Anecdote
Marie has a specific repetition
compulsion around her love relationships; despite her best efforts,
she always ends up dating drug addicts. Time and time again, it starts
out the same: He's a great guy, he has a respectable job, he's really
sweet. Time and time again, it grows into a major conflict when Marie
realizes that the person she loves also has a drug habit that takes
a lot of his time and effort away from her.
Over time, Marie realized that this was the
same dynamic she had with her father, except that he was unavailable
because he was so busy with work, not because of a drug habit. While
the story was slightly different, the theme was the same: The person
she needs and loves is unavailable to her because they are busy getting
their "fix." When she realized this connection and grieved
the loss of her father, she was also able to grieve the hope that
things would someday be different with him. This allowed Marie to
let go of that unresolved conflict and move on to date people who
were available to her. |
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Quote
for you
"Those who cannot remember the past
are condemned to repeat it."
— George Santayana |
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